Regardless, I will start again.
Yesterday, on the radio program
“Writers and Company,” in response to a question on what his
biggest extravagance was, Chris Hadfield, the astronaut and author,
replied that he had 12 guitars. “It's easier to buy a guitar than
to play one,” is what he said. That's what I've been doing with
writing. I've been buying and reading books on writing, but haven't
actually written something for awhile.
So I'm going to put down my book and
pick up my pen, figuratively speaking anyway, and start again.
New Year's seems like a fitting time to
start anything, new and new for the second time. Lingering vestiges
of Christmas have been cleaned up and the year stretches out like a
blank canvas, awaiting paint, happy splashes of yellow and blue,
perhaps a stripe of black, and various shades of green.
Last year at this time, as I stood on
the brink of 2013, my vision of what the year would hold turned out
to be very different than the reality. I had plans and dreams and
aspirations that got rearranged one month into the year. A person
can plan and arrange (which generally I like to do), but life doesn't
necessarily adhere to those plans. What continued to give me comfort
and assurance and strength to carry on when I felt like I didn't have
a clue was the knowledge that God was walking with me every step of
the way and that when I took moments to calm my mind in God's
presence, there was always help available to me. That is one lesson
I want to carry with me into the new year. I'm also less eager to
make specific plans for the future and more willing to meet the
future as it comes to me.
However, I do have a few aspirations
this year. Not resolutions, exactly, just ideas I'd like to practise
a bit.
The first one is to have less stuff,
but better stuff. I like things, so I bring them home. And then it
often doesn't take long before the stuff I liked becomes clutter and
then a nuisance and then a burden, or trash. I end up throwing
things out or sending them to the thrift store or relegating them to
the attic because I've brought home things that don't have lasting
power. I'd like to follow William Morris' axiom, “If you want a
golden rule that will fit everything, this is it: Have nothing in
your houses that you do not know to be useful or believe to be
beautiful.” The only problem there is that sometimes my definition
of beauty changes, or my expectations of usefulness are too low. I want to cultivate greater discretion in the things I haul home.
The second thing is that I am going to
endeavor to both acknowledge and accept my natural rhythms. I am an
early riser – always have been, but for some reason I often feel
“less than” because of it. Boring and diligent people get up
early in the morning; interesting and engaging people stay up late.
But now, after all these years, I am going to acknowledge that I am a
boring and diligent person and I wake up early in the morning.
Staying up late does not, in fact, make me an interesting and
engaging person; it makes me a tired and groggy and perhaps even
grumpy person. And so, in an effort to accept the way that I am, I
am no longer going to feel guilty for waking up early, and am instead
going to use those blissful, quiet moments or minutes or hours to
accomplish some of the things I am not going to accomplish late in
the evening. (Of course, as soon as I decided that, I was
overwhelmed with the urge to sleep in every morning....)
Which leads to my final aspiration.
My hope is to again get into a routine of posting to my blog once a
week. Writing my blog helps me to stay present in my own life, to
pay attention to the gift that each day is, to process and absorb
lessons I gain from experience. These are things that I value
highly, but so easily lose in the routine of regular days.
So here's to 2014. May we be people
who are prepared for what lies in store for us.
“For I know the plans
I have for you,” declares the Lord,
“plans to prosper you
and not to harm you,
plans to give you hope
and a future.
Then you will call on
me and come and pray to me
and I will listen to
you.
You will seek me and
find me
when you seek me with
all your heart.”
Jeremiah 29:11-13
I like what you said about staying present in your own life. I find too that it is easy to keep rolling along, reacting to everything around me and yet never get a real grip on how I got to that point or if I actually like the way I am reacting. Finding a few minutes every day to focus on God and what's important helps me remember who I am and who I want to be. We all need a little breathing room to be ourselves in the midst of all the clutter and chaos. Thanks for the reminder!
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